Warped
by remmeeyy
Summary: fan fic about alex gaskarth. it was originally like 4 chapters, but i couldn't be bothered to split it so what i have done so far is one big chapter.
1. Chapter 1 actually 4 chapters

"My heart don't stop, da da da da something something"

I sung to myself as I poured milk into my bowl of rice bubbles.

"Kaya, honey, you're up pretty early for the first day of the summer holidays" mum said as she took the washing through to the laundry.

"I've got that concert thing today Mum, remember Cassie's taking me too? Warped Tour I think it's called. Something like that" I told her through a mouthful of cereal.

"Uhh huh. And 17 year olds are allowed to go are they my precious little girl?" she laughed to herself.

"Very funny mother but you already said I could go so hah" I poked my tongue at her.

"yeah yeah chill I'm not gonna try and stop you" she sighed as she walked out.

I didn't even know why I was up at 9 anyway, the bands Cassie wants to see start playing at 2.30pm. Her boyfriend was in one of the bands, started with A... An.. Oh yeah, Anarbor. I never used to listen to music along the punk, rock lines but I gotta say, they've turned me. Her boyfriend was Slade, and yeah, he was maybe a bit older then her but he is one of the nicest guys ever. His band was pretty amazing. They were just starting out, literally and this was they first shot at something big. They had never done a performance like this.

At around 1pm I was waiting outside in my faded skinny jeans, bright blue tiger shoes, and a shirt my friend made for me, covered in prints of polaroid photos. I was so comfy. I had a feeling I was going to regret wearing jeans, but whatever. My favourite necklace sat on my breastbone, and that cold familiar feeling made me feel ok. I never ever too this necklace off. Ever. The little gold bird charm meant the world to me, and I didn't even know why. I actually found it when we visited our family friends in Maryland, when I was 7. It's been on my neck ever since. As Cass pulled up in her car, music blearing Mum yelled something about raging drunks as I got in. I looked up at her in the window, and she laughed and shooed us off. Gotta love her. Cass yelled a hi and bye before we drove off.

After half an hour, Cass was still belting her lungs out to the music. "RUN BABY RUN! DON'T EVER LOOK BACK, THEY'LL TEAR US APART IF YOU GIVE THEM THE CHANCE!"

she looked at me and laughed while she was singing along, probably because I had wicked awesome air drumming skills. We sung for the rest of the 20 minutes until we saw the set up of stages and people everywhere. What a massive crowd. I had never been to something like this. My stomach fluttered. I was actually a bit scared.

Cass clipped my backstage pass to me and patted my head with an excited smile. I felt like such a little kid. But I was excited too.

"We still have like, 20 minutes before my sexy boyfriend comes on stage" Cass stated as I rolled my eyes jokingly.

I was excited for We The Kings, mainly because I actually knew some of their songs, and I had a weird love for Travis' flaming long orange hair. It was unusually awesome. They were playing after Anarbor, then there was another band after that to finish off that section. I didn't know who, Cass didn't tell me so I walked over and examined to line up poster as Cass talked with some other friends she found. I ran my finger down the list, and naturally started talking to myself.

"Anarbor... We The Kings... All Time Low... Who are they? They definitely sound emo. They better be ok, I think Cass wants to stay and watch them." I started humming. I turned around to bump into a guy, who was taller then me. He had an odd look on his face. Embarrassed and awkward, but not because I had bumped into him I think. He had his hands in his pocked. I looked at his tag thing, at it read ALL TIME LOW. My eyes widened as I became red and embarrassed. This poor guy had heard be bagging out his band.

"We're not that bad, I promise. Just stay and see" he said, before giving me a huge smile. I nearly melted. In fact, I think I did a bit. I started saying something, well I tried too but he just laughed and said, "don't worry our name kinda gives that impression. But stay and see us, ok? Promise?"

I couldn't say no to that gorgeous face, and I was still embarrassed so I just held up my pinky and he laughed and wrapped his pinky around mine, before smiling and walking off towards the stage.

I was bouncing around in the mosh with Cass, screaming and dancing to 'You and I' by Anarobr. Slade was so cute, he could stop looking at Cassie and he even stuffed up the words at one point from being distracted. I was having fun, and I had finally recovered from my embarrassing encounter with the All Time Low member. I think he would be the bassist. Or maybe lead guitar. Not drummer, as nice as his arms were, they weren't drumming arms. He wouldn't be the singer, nah. He looked kinda shy. Or maybe his looks were tricking me. I mean, he could stand on stage holding a guitar and would still look good. Specially if he smiled. Ok, Kaya, seriously, shut up. I realised how much thought I had just put into this guy, who I knew nothing about, and hadn't actually managed to say a word too. When Anarbor finished and We The Kings was getting ready to come on stage, I took advantage of the semi silence to talk to Cass.

"Hey, I just ran into a member from All Time Low before, and I'm trying to work out who he is" I had to kind of yell it at her.

"What did he look like" she asked, getting ready to think.

"Um, pretty damn gorgeous" I laughed. "Longish brown hair, not that dark, with lots of different kinda streaks through it. He had a killer smile and was pretty tall. His hair went on and around his face."

"Oh! oh oh I know! Umm ummmmm... yeah his' name is -"

I didn't hear the rest of her sentence as We The Kings came on stage. I let it go, with effort, laughing to myself at her frustrated face. We both smiled and got ready to scream and dance and be totally idiots to the music. Travis did a quick intro, and just before they started playing I screamed out "I LOVE YOU HAIR TRAVIS!" and he stopped on stage and looked at me laughing. "Thank you! I like yours too" he said into the mic. I gave him a thumbs up and a huge smile as they started playing their first song.

Well, that was one of my goals in life accomplished. I have confessed my love for Travis Clark's hair. And I must admit, the mosh wasn't as scary as I though it would be.

After We The Kings, Cass was trying to say something. I couldn't really hear her, but from the words I managed to catch and her apologetic face, I got the idea she wanted to go see Slade.

"That's fine" I mouthed. She gave me a quick hug and squeezed her way through the mosh. I just wanted to see one of All Time Low's songs, just cause I promised. The crowd started cheering as they do when a new band comes on, and cause it was getting a bit dark to lights on that stage made everything look cooler. I saw that guy, finally come on stage. And he walked right up the the front middle mic, holding his bright green electric guitar. Ah. Lead singer, and guitarist. Nice. He introduced himself, as Alex Gaskarth, a little awkwardly but then the guy on his right, who looked a bit like him but with black streaky hair, and ridiculously skinny, threw an empty water bottle at him. "Thanks Jack" Alex laughed picking up the water bottle and chucking it off stage. Jack smiled and they all looked around and each other before starting their first song. There were four of them. Alex, Jack who played guitar, the guy on Alex's left, who was a bit of a hottie, who played base, and then the very smiley drummer.

_Hey kid you've got, a lot of potential _

_but I think it's time to move on,_

_so go on and blow us away with your sound._

Holy fuck, Alex had an amazing voice. I stood dumbfounded as listen to the rest of the song,

_Stay seventeen, the party scene has got the best of me_

I was in love with this band! Not in that way, they were just incredible. And they couldn't be that much older then me. Maybe 20. But I'm guessing 19. Alex's eyes somehow met mine and he smiled his gorgeous smile at me. I felt like passing out. Come to think of it I actually wasn't feeling well. I had been moshing for almost 4 hours, and I hadn't had any water or a rest. I lasted till half way through All Time Low's last song, before I looked up and met Alex's eyes once more, then I blacked out.

I woke up on the ground to the sound of yelling. Many people yelling. Not at me either. Around me. I then felt an excrustiating pain as someone stomped on my wrist. My eyes adjusted and I could see a had blacked out for about 10 seconds. I woke in time to hear to music cut off. I then heard Alex Gaskarth yelling into the microphone. "Stop fucking jumping and help her up don't just jump around!" his voice sound slighlty frantic and pissed off. I could help but let the tears flow as the pain in my wrist got worse and worse. But head was throbbing and I could bring myself to get up. I hurt. In the moments of confusion I shut my eyes and imagined silence. I blocked out the screaming and shoving. I felt myselt get trampled some more. I cradeled my legs in my arms on my side. I opened my eyes and saw the crowd had split, and someone was coming towards me. Before I blacked out, I felt hands scoop me up. I felt someone stroke my hair. I saw a blur of shapes and colours. I heard Alex's voice telling people to back off. But his voive was coming from right next to me, not the stage. He had picked me up, and started moving towards the side of the stage. I thought I was going to black out again, but I kept my eyes open, and hugged alex tightly as he carried my away from the noise. I was still crying and when he put me down on something, a piece of equipment I think, I started shaking. He had my face in his arms and he was talking to me but I couldn't hear. The first voice I heard was Cassie. I cocked my head, and saw her appear right next to me, frantic and asking Alex what had happened. Her eyes widened as she saw me clutching my wrist. It took Cass and Alex Gaskarth half an hour to calm me down. When I finally stopped shaking alex smiled at me.

"You're ok, I promise. You're wrist is a bit fucked but its not to bad, just sprained and bruised." he said, immediately making me feel better.

"I'm so sorry!" I started blabbering about passing out and how I should have had more to drink and so on.

Alex laughed and told be to calm down.

"it's fine, it was our last song anyway, and besides it's my fault I made you promise to stay and watch. Look how well that turned out for you" he said frowning.

"you guys, we incredible!" I pretty much hurled my words at him.

"Thanks" he said smiling.

Damn that smile.

After my wrist had been strapped and I had finally re-hydrated myself, I was given the ok bye the medic. Cass was walking with me back to the car, and she was pissed at herself for leaving me in the mosh but I wasn't angry at her at all. We almost got to the car, when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

I turned around to see a smiling Alex. "I never got your name" he said.

"I'm Kaya, and this is Cass." I said, pointing to my best friend.

"Well then, Kaya, and Cass, do you wanna come hang on our bus? I have to say, its pretty awesome. And I want to make it up to you for what happened" he asked nervously.

I was about to answer, but Cass beat me too it.

"I was actually planning on chilling with Anarbor, cause I'm going out with Slade, but I'm sure Kaya would love to, right Kaya?" she said winking at me.

"I, ah, um, yeah I mean I could.. yeah. Sure." I muttered, also nervous.

"Sweet! Well, then come on, he said taking my good wrist.

His touch was so gentle and warm and as I looked back at Cass to mouth Thank you, I felt his hand slip into my hand. I blushed. Alex blushed.

Then he smiled at me. "You have to meet the rest of the band. It will be fun"

I was just still happy he was holding my hand. I am usually not happy this easily. I smiled and nodded excitedly.

We talked quickly on the way to the bus. I was right, he was 19. I told him I was talked more about ourselves but we soon approached the bus. Alex walked on, and pulled a hesitant me on after him. I was greeted my a rib crushing hug.

"Hey you!" Jack said, about an inch from my face. His big goofy smile made me laugh.

"I saw you collapse so I stopped playing and yelled at Alex who jumped off-stage and got you" Jack continued.

"Trust!" someone said from behind me.

"oh Kaya this is Zack," Alex said pointing to the guy who just spoken. "And Jack," he pointed to Jack, "and that, back there is Rian." he pointed down the back of the bus and a face popped out and smiled at me. I smiled back at Rian, then to Jack and Zack.

"Sorry that the bus is a bit of a mess, but we aren't leaving till early in the morning so we wont clean till just before we go. We are all lazy shits" Alex said pointing to the crap that covered the floor.

"No problem" I laughed.

Alex grabbed my hand which made me blush again, then led me to the couch where there were doritos and guitars. As he grabbed my hand, a saw Jack and Zack share a glance and I blushed even more. About 15 minutes later, I was laughing to a song Alex was improvising about Rian, when someone called Alex's name from outside the bus.

"One sec" he said jumping off the couch. He was outside for a second, when we heard him yell "Guys, and Kaya, I'll be back in a few minutes.

"Kay" we all yelled in unison.

Almost immediately Jack and Zack came and sat on either side of me and stared at me. It was kinda weird, but Zack broke the silence...

"Soooo... Alex likes you"

"pfft as if" I said, awkwardly. I blushed yet again.

"Ohh trust me he does. We have known Alex for a long time, he likes you" Jack stated.

I tried to play it cool but all that escaped my mouth was a giggle and a mumble. Alex liked me? no way! They must just be teasing me. That gorgeous smile could have anyone, and yet he apparently liked me. Off all people, me. I couldn't help but smile, so I just smiled.

"She's a cute one" Jack said jokingly as he and Zack went to play video games with Rian a few metres away.

A few seconds later, Alex appeared on the bus. He saw my tired eyes as I watched the TV screen that was showing some video game everyone was playing, and he asked if I wanted to walk around or something.

I smiled as followed him towards the door. It was getting dark now.

"Alex" Rian called from the other end of the bus.

Alex turned and looked at him. I couldn't quite read the expression on his face, but apparently Alex could.

"Rian, chill" Alex said. Rians face stayed uneasy as we left the bus.

When we were out of hearing distance, I turned to Alex/

"What was that all about?"

"With Rian?" he asked

"Yeah.

He sighed. "Well, he, I mean, non of them trust me with girls." he said, rather fast.

"Ahh bit of a heart breaker huh?" I said laughing.

"No, I just, I... I can be really uneasy sometimes, not really in relation to girls. Apparently my mood affects everyone, but the guys have grown to live with it." he sounded sad.

I immediately felt bad.

"oh well sorry I, didn't mean-"

"It's ok, you didn't do anything." he looked at me.

There was that gorgeous smile dammit. Dammit dammit. I was sucked in. I don't know what came over me but I had a sudden urge, to give him a really big hug.

We both stepped in at the same time and I laughed at how close we came together. He laughed to. We were really close. My laughing was cut off by his lips crashing onto mine.


	2. Chapter 2 its actually 5 chapters xD

The kiss was quick and intense, and amazing. He pulled away and looked and me, nervously. My smile might of hinted the fact that I was 110% happy right now.  
"So..." I didn't really know what to say. But then I remembered he was leaving in the morning to continue touring, and my heart dropped so much, my feet were heavier. He saw my sunk expression.  
"This sounds completely insane Kaya, but, come on tour with us?" he looked straight at me.  
"Seriously? I, I don't know. I mean summer break is only for 9 weeks-" I started  
"Tour ends in 6 weeks" he finished off for me.  
My smile got bigger and bigger as I realised the chance me actually going with them. I thought how rash it seemed, but I couldn't help but think about how happy it would make me, and sometimes it's good to think about yourself.  
"Give me, 10 minutes ok? I need to talk to a few people" I said getting ready to leave.  
"Ok, meet me back at the bus?" he said as a ran away.  
"Yep!" I yelled, still running.  
I sprinted to Anarbor's bus and was a tad out of breath as I crashed into Slade.  
"Ouch! Jesus Kaya!" Slade remarked a bit surprised.  
"Shove it lovely! I'm in love. I need to talk to Cass!" I said as I tried to squeeze pass him.  
He started laughing. "Oh Kaya, she's on the couch." he said, still laughing.  
I jokingly punched him in the shoulder as I ran and practically jumped on Cassie's lap. I scared the crap out of my half asleep best friend.  
"WOAH. Kaya? What's up you look, ridiculously happy right now. What the hell did I miss?" she exclaimed, sitting up excitedly.  
"I'm in love with Alex." I spat at her.  
"Gaskarth?" she squealed a bit.  
"Yes. He asked me to come on the rest of the tour with them. I'm so excited it's ridiculous. Like, redonk." I couldn't stop smiling.  
"Oh my God! That's awesome! Does this mean I can go on tour with Slade, and not feel like a total bitch for leaving you behind?" she looked excited.  
"Hells Yeah!" I said as we hi-fived each other.  
Slade walked back in the bus, confused by our over excitement.  
"Slade, I'm taking the spare bunk!" Cass ran and kissed him mid sentenced.  
"Yay!" He looked like such a kid. "And Kaya," he continued "let me guess. You're going on tour with Alex?"  
"How'd you know?" I asked, a bit confused.  
"Well, if you had just seen him, he looks like a little kid at christmas with a smile bigger then the fucking tires!" he laughed as he saw my face blush and my smile somehow widen further.  
"Ok, I'm going now, to the bus, and I love you both, and I'll see you in like 2 weeks right? Somewhere on tour?" I already started walking out.  
"Yes yes, we will see you soon. Oh hang on Kaya," Cass said going to her bag. She pulled out a bundle of folded clothes, a jumper and a pair of flip flops. She handed them to me. "You know I'm prepared for everything" she said followed by an exaggerated wink.  
"It's why I love you!" I gave her a sloppy wet kiss on the cheek before running out of the bus. Last thing I heard was Cass and Slade yelling out "Have fun!" As I ran across towards my temporary 6 week home. I stopped mid way and pulled out my phone. I dialed mum's number.  
"Mum, you know how you met Dad over seas, and traveled with him for like 3 months, then you guys got married and it was all really sudden? Well I've met someone and... they want me to come on tour with them for 6 weeks. I'll be back by the time school starts. Please, please, please, please?"  
I slammed the phone down with a scream of joy after telling mum how much I loved her. Damn she could be awesome sometimes. She agreed, as long as I stay in touch, don't do anything stupid, and she likes the fact that Alex is still in his teens. I could not be any happier then now. I ran again, to All Time Low's bus and Alex jumped up from his seat on the bus stairs.  
"Aaalleexxx!" I yelled excitedly as I approached him. "I can come!"  
He gave me a big happy hug before putting me down again and smiled as he practically shoved me onto the bus. He took my huge armful of stuff and placed it nicely on the spare bit of the couch.  
Jack, Rian and Zack came and all hi-fived me, grinning.  
"Welcome aboard to the messiest piece of crap bus you'll ever see!" Rian said gesturing around the bus. Alex laughed and led me to the spare bunk. There was a pile of chocolates on the pillow and Alex said "Trust me, they're the best" before winking and walking off to get me some stuff I might need. I lay on my bunk, opposite Alex's and under Rian's. This was going to be one hell of a summer. My excitement got the best of me. I started falling asleep, and when I was just about to be out of it, I felt pressure on my bed as someone lay down beside me. Their body was warm and I felt at home as Alex kissed my head and snuggled in closer.

I lurched awake when my head hit the frame of my bunk. "Owww" I moaned as I opened my eyes.  
"Please excuse Jack, he is a retarded driver." Alex whispered in my ear. I giggled and sat up. Alex continued. "Usually we don't let Jack drive, cause I mean, we don't wanna die."  
I laughed then tried to cover it when I heard Jack yell "I can hear Alex you dick- shit! That came out of no where!"  
"Jack, stop signs don't appear out of no where, and you're supposed to stop when you see one." Zack said laughing.  
"Shut up Zachary!" Jack muttered.  
I sat up in the bunk and Alex climbed over me to get out and stretch his arms and legs. We had been driving for about 4 and a half hours but I still felt excited. I looked at the window, and saw... well not much. A whole lot of nothing. I don't think anyone was really paying attention to where we were going except Jack and Zack who were up the front driving. Jack was concentrating very hard, it looked like it was painful for him.  
About 20 minutes later after I had washed my face and had a bowl of some very childish cereal, which tasted amazing, Jack pulled over for a petrol and food stop. I went inside the petrol station and chose out a chocolate and a bottle of water and took it to the counter. When I looked up at the face serving me I saw surprised to see a young female face staring back. She glared at me. I handed her my money but she just kept staring.  
"Um, is there something wrong? Or..." I didn't know what the hell was wrong with her but I had to ask.  
"That you're band?" she said eyeing the bus parked outside.  
"No, I'm just friends with them... Going on tour with them. I'm just helping out with merch and stuff." I smiled at her but her glare didn't brake. It was getting uncomfortable now.  
"Fuckin' slut" she muttered, under her breath.  
"Excuse me?" I was shocked that she just said that to me.  
"You heard me. You're a whore, and you're sleeping you're way to fame." Her look was murderous as she said it.  
"Jesus... As wrong as you are, mind you're own fucking business." I spat the words at her as I left without buying anything. I was almost at the door when I bumped into a rather large guy. I tried to walk past him, but he wouldn't let me through.  
"Watch what you say bitch" he said leaning in.  
"Just let me through, please" I was scared. This guy looked crazy. I looked outside but the guys were all facing away from me and too far away to hear what was going on. I started panicking.  
"Look, I didn't mean to cause any trouble, sorry" I tried getting past again. In a quick swift motion, he shoved me into the shelf behind me. I screamed as I felt the corner of the shelf cut into by back.  
"Alex!" I yelled, my voice cracking. The guy picked me up and dragged me outside. I struggled free and at the same time Alex appeared and threw himself at the guy. Rian and Zack were close behind too. I heard Alex cry out as he fell to the ground. I couldn't see his face. Zack picked me up and I saw Rian and Jack half carrying, half dragging Alex towards the bus. The crazy guy spat at us before storming inside. Zack put me down in the back and jumped in the drivers seat. Rian, Jack, and a sub-conscious Alex managed to get in the back and I scrambled over to make room on the seat. Zack was already driving away, fast, and were out of site of that petrol station. The shock set in and I stared to cry. Alex was now fully conscious and Jack got him some ice from the freezer in a towel for where he was whacked in the head.. Rian turned to me. "You ok?" he asked gently.  
I couldn't answer. I was shaken and the pain in back was silencing me.  
"Kaya!" Alex yelled, pointing at me. He scrambled over and pulled me away from the seat. There was blood everywhere. Alex pulled me into a hug. As I sobbed on his shoulder I let him pull my shirt mostly off.  
"Jesus fucking christ" he stated, and he lay me down on my stomach so he could get to the gash on my back. Him and Jack patched me up with what they could find. Some antiseptic, and white patch thing that they taped over the wound after they had wiped the blood up with someone's T-shirt. By now I had calmed down. I sat up, wincing a bit. The cut was on my shoulder bone, and it really ached. "Thanks guys. I'm so sorry, I don' even know what happened back there. The girl just said-"  
Rian cut me off. "Don't worry about it. That guy was a FREAK." We laughed a bit. Then they all, except Zack cause he was driving, looked at me awkwardly. Fuck, I still had no shirt on. I went bright red. Alex gave me one of his button up shirts to cover it up with. I sighed at my blood stained polaroid shit on the floor of the bus.  
"Oh, this is yours too, I took it off when we were fixing your back" Alex said as he handed me my gold bird charm necklace.  
That was the first time the necklace had ever been taken off me. He clipped it back around my neck, and smothered my neck in kisses.  
I think I finally had a reason to hold onto this necklace. It was Alex.

Have you ever woken up and had a total spaz attack because you forgot where you were? Well I woke up screaming, and nearly made Zack crash the bus. I woke up Alex, Rian and Jack with my yelling and they all freaked out and thought there was a serial killer on the seats. Zack got a shock but he was laughing the whole time as he tried to find the lights, and stay in control of the van. I covered my mouth and stayed like that until the lights were on and everyone started cracking up. I was pretty embarrassed, cause that has never happened to me before. Everyone made a joke out of it. Everyone, except Alex. I turned to him next to me, and was surprised by the look on his face. He was totally zoned out, and his eyes were glistening.  
"Alex?... Alex?" I said, almost yelling. He didn't snap out of it. Rian came over and shook Alex's shoulders, too harshly I thought, but he snapped out of his weird trance. I looked at him laughing but I stopped when I saw Rian and Jack's faces. They exchanged looks of caution. I looked back at Alex. He looked... sad.  
A few hours later we arrived at the next venue for the tour. We had about 3 hours till we needed to do anything, so during those 3 hours Alex and I stayed in the back of the car while the guys went to the trailer to play video games and pay each other out. I started thinking about this relationship I had with Alex. It was so random, so sudden, and yet, I didn't doubt him one bit. I needed to talk to him. There was something he wasn't telling me, and whether he was going to or not, I needed to try.  
I sat next to him in silence in the back seat. We were the only ones in the van. I was early in the morning and the light was pleasant and calm.  
"Alex..." I said to him, gently.  
He turned to face me. A single tear ran down his face and I wiped it away with my sleeve.  
"Alex what's wrong? I know something is bothering you." I said it as softly as I could, without whispering.  
"I just.." he started. "You just brought back a memory, that's all. I remember when I used to wake up screaming and... I don't know. It made me feel how I used to. Guilty." he looked at his hands as he told me.  
I was really confused. But I saw the sadness in his eyes, and I don't think this was something he wanted to talk about. So I took both his hands, and locked his eyes with mine. Instead of searching his gaze, I leant in, and gave him my second kiss. I had still only kissed him once before, the night we had met. He kissed back, with more passion this time. His hands grabbed my face, and he pulled me onto him. I let myself in closer, and our bodies were awkwardly a-lined along the back seat and side door. I lifted my weight off him a bit so he could sit up without having things sticking into his back, like car door handles. His kiss grew extremely intense, and I let my hands run over his back, under his shirt, then around his chest. She shivered at my touch. His hands took hold of mine, and he pulled them out from under his shirt and held them. He pulled away for a moment, and whispered 'thank you' in my ear. I looked back at him. I saw that smile of his. Everything immediately felt better. With my hands still in his, he helped me out of the van. I was walking in front of him and he pulled me back into a tight embrace. We switched around so I was against the car, and we started kissing, again. He just couldn't help himself. Mind you, neither could I, and I was having inappropriate thoughts about him at that very moment. I almost laughed to myself. But I didn't thankfully, because I opened my eyes and saw Jack standing about 2 meters away, with an awkward look on his face.  
I broke away from Alex, and swiveled him round.  
"Ohhh. Hey Jack.." he said facing his best friend.  
"Um, I was gonna get my jumper out of the car, but I got distracted my you two. For a minute I thought you were having sex against the van-"  
"Jack!" Alex and I said simultaneously.  
"Sorry, sorry, I love stirring people up, you know that" he laughed as he said that.  
I laughed as Jack did a weird dance past us to get into the van. Alex and I walked towards where All Time Low were going to do sound checks and stuff.  
"Hey, Kaya, I have a favour." Alex said, facing me.  
"Yeah?" I replied, smiling sweetly.  
"Can you be out merch chick?" he said putting on some weird accent which made me laugh.  
"Hells yeah! I'm great at selling stuff." I said enthusiastically.  
He took my hand, smiling and led me to where the merch booth was gonna be, and talked me through prices and set ups and stuff. Over the next few hours I helped set up the merch stall, and I even helped some other bands set up their stalls. I was pegging a lead to the ground, when a girls voice broke my concentration.  
"Um, excuse me?" she said shyly, tapping my shoulder.  
I left the peg, it was pissing me off anyways. "Yeah?" I said turning to face a girl., who looked about my age. Maybe a tad younger.  
"You have blood all over your back" She stated, pointing.  
"Fuck! I totally forgot about that. Shit shit shit." the blood from the slash on my back had leaked through the shirt I had on, the one of Alex's.  
"Hang on.. Here." she said handing me a tea towel or something. She then helped me pull my shirt up a bit and take off the taped white thing that was covering it. It looked pretty gross, but this girl didn't flinch, and she just helped me clean it up a bit. She was well prepared, and even had another dressing thing to cover the cut. We were done in about 4 minutes.  
"Thanks a bunch, sorry you had to see all that. What's your name?" I asked, still holding the slightly bloody towel.  
"Ellie" she said smiling.  
"How old are you Ellie?"  
"15" she sighed.  
"You here by yourself?" I asked her, looking around.  
"Yeah, my mum finally let me come to warped tour, I have begged her for the last two years, and she finally said yes. I suppose she saw my dedication," she laughed. "I just wanted to see my favourite band. Oh and by the way, please don't tell on me, I'm not supposed to be around here yet, cause I'm not part of the crew for anyone, and I'm under 16" she said a little frantically. "I just really want to meet my favourite band. They are my heroes. Their music got me through some shit in my life."  
I looked at her, before reassuring her that I wouldn't tell anyone.  
"So.. who is this favourite band of yours?" I asked her.  
"You probably haven't heard of them.. All Time Low?" she said looking up at me.  
Like I didn't see that one coming. I was about to answer he when she suddenly went red, and turned away, muttering 'oh my god oh my god oh my god'. I looked behind me to where she had seen something and saw Alex and Zack walking past about 20 metres away.  
"Holy crap that's them! What do I do? they might get pissed off at me from sneaking in... any suggestions?" she asked hurriedly.  
"Yeah I can think of one... Hey Alex! Zack!" I yelled at them. They started walking over. Ellie's jaw dropped.  
"Hey Kaya, what's up?" Alex asked.  
"I think, you might have your biggest fan, right here." I smiled, pointing to Ellie, who looked like she was about to cry.  
Alex and Zack exchanged looks of understanding, and smiled at each other before nearly suffocating an ecstatic Ellie in a Alex'n'Zack sandwich. I could hear her laughing as she was being hugged, and I mean, who wouldn't find that experience enjoyable?  
They pulled away from a super happy Ellie, and we all talked for a few minutes about how Ellie managed to sneak in early. After I got a photo of the three of them, Alex and Zack said goodbye to their fan, so they could go start sound check. I went to the merch stall, and pulled out a medium All Time Low T-shirt to give to Ellie. She tried to give me money for it, but I had already paid for it through me. She kept her money, and slipped the shirt over her clothes and smiled at me. I had definitely made someone's dream come true. After she left to go line up, I smiled to myself. It felt good making someone else that happy. If only it was that easy to make anyone that happy. I sighed as I looked over at Alex, tuning his guitar. Behind his gorgeous smile, and positive expression, I could still sense that there was something deeper, something wrong, ripping at his heart.

It's been almost 2 weeks since I decided to go on tour with All Time Low. To my surprise, I wasn't home sick, (I missed my mum a bit) but I was so distracted cause I was having such a good time! I hadn't done anything completely stupid yet, although many people would think that running away with a stranger for over a month was a pretty dumb idea. But what I found, was that rather then our relationship growing, Alex and I had developed an extremely close knit friendship bond. Even though we slept in the same bunk most nights, it was just for comfort. We both were extremely fond of hugs. Nothing had really happened between us, and I'm not really sure how I felt about it, but Alex was such a good friend, having him around was enough for me. I think.

I was sitting on the couch with my phone in my lap, and hell, I was so tired I almost fell asleep sitting up. That was, until Zack came and sat on my lap. It was like someone gently placing a tonne of fucking gold on your lap. Damn, that boy was solid muscle. I swear, if you tried hard enough, you could grate cheese on his abs.

I had become close with all the boys, and I sort of became Zack, Rian and Jack's therapist. Even though I was younger, everyone always told me that I was wiser then most adults. I also formed to be their 'mum' which was, the most tiring job ever. If I hear a drunk Jack whine at me for food one more time... I'll probably just have to make him something, cause he has irresistible puppy dog eyes.  
I didn't drink, so when ever a group of about 40 half naked randoms appear on the bus most night for a party, I'm in charge. I didn't really mind though, but I felt sometimes o was missing out on the fun.

Zack sat on my lap as if it was completely normal for me to not be breathing, looking through a mens health magazine. My slightly dying chokes were interrupted by my phone vibrating in my lap, right under Zack's ass. He didn't even notice. He must be bullet proof or something. However, things became awkward, cause after I stopped pretending I couldn't breathe I was trying to get my phone, and jack walked past just as my hand was basically feeling Zack up.

"HAHAHAHA" Jack started cracking up as he pulled out the damn buzznet phone. There is now a video of me on storage, supposedly feeling up the ass of a completely oblivious Zack. Awesome.

After giving Jack the finger, Zack finally moved and he started cracking up because he was totally aware of everything that had been going on. Little shit. He started tickling me, and I completely lost it. I was laughing so hard I was crying, plus I was screaming and hitting Zack at the same time. It got to the point where we were rolling around on the floor, and I was still laughing like a lunatic. Tickling was one of my biggest weaknesses. Especially my ribs. You had me under control if you tickled me there.

Zack finally gave me a breather, and stopped poking my ribs. I took a while to stop laughing, but I was enjoying myself. Then Alex walked in.  
it wouldn't of been a problem, if Zack wasn't lying directly on top of me on the floor, and jack and Rian were no where in sight.

Alex just looked, hurt, and a bit awkward so he backed out of the bus.

"Shit" I muttered to myself as I scrambled off the floor. Zack helped me up and mouthed sorry at me. I smiled at him. He didn't do anything wrong.

I ran outside to catch up with Alex. I got to him and he turned around. I was relieved to see that he wasn't angry with me. I was surprised when he pulled me into a very, very intimate hug. He pulled me so close and we had our arms wrapped around each other for ages. But it felt right. He pulled away a little so his face was in line with mine, and he looked at me, with an unsure expression. He gave me a little kiss, as if he was asking me first. My answer was a bigger kiss. We stood there like idiots kissing for a while. There weren't really any people around so we didn't care.

"Kaya...I don't know if I've got you yet, but if I do, I don't want to lose you. It would just about kill me" Alex said staring deep into my eyes.

Something in his words scared me. I didn't know if my heart was strong enough for his.

In the middle of the night, I woke up to Alex gently prodding me. We were sharing my bunk as usual. Just for comfort. I hated being woken up.  
"Nooo.. later.."  
"Kaya, is it really hot in here?.. or is it just me." Alex said sounding groggy.  
"Are you kidding? Its hell cold" I muttered with a little shiver.  
I rolled over and put he back of my hand on Alex's forehead.  
"Jesus boy! You are steaming. Are you feeling alright?"  
"No not really" he muttered getting out of my bunk when I grabbed his hand. I led him to the mini bus kitchen and got a damp cloth for him. He held it to his head and let out a sigh of relief.  
"I'll be fine lets just get some more sleep" he smiled at me.  
We were asleep within the next 5 minutes.  
The next morning however was not good. Alex had completely lost his singing voice, and they had a show to play tonight. One of his random band friends who was practising to be a doctor said he wont have his voice back in time for the show.  
He moped around all morning, and by 12.30pm I was fed up.  
"Fuck it, Alex lets do something. The guys are happy for a day off, so their chilling. Don't worry. But you're moping."  
"I want to show you something" he said with what voice he had left.  
He grabbed my hand and we climbed up into his bunk. He shut the curtain and I sat cross-legged against the wall. Alex pulled out a green crumpled hand made type book from down the side of his mattress. I watched him pull it out, and I saw him quickly shove another book that came out with the other one. It was black and silver and he quickly shoved it down the side of his mattress. I pretended not to see and he bought it. He handed me the green book, slightly grinning. I looked at the front and it said ALEX'S SONGS. It was so cute, clearly written by a younger Alex.  
"Can I read it?"  
He nodded blushing a bit.  
I opened to a random page. Bad habit of mine, I never read anything straight from beginning to end.  
I opened it to a page titled 'Therapy". I read through the lyrics.  
"Alex this is amazing" I exclaimed opening to another page. I read and read. The book was packed. I sat there for about 2 and a half hours, just reading. I asked Alex about all of his songs, and I could tell which ones were written recently or ages ago. I noticed though when I wasn't talking, I'd look up at Alex and he was lost in thoughts. Something was troubling him. I kept reading, and glanced up to his face then back to the book. My eyes snapped back up when I saw him discreetly wipe silent tears from his eyes.  
"Alex, baby, are you ok?" I questioned, gently. I moved closer to him. He just shook his head from side to side and let the tears fall freely. I hugged him and his tears stained my shoulder. He wasn't sobbing or anything though. The tears just flowed. He stopped after a few minutes, and after giving me a gentle kiss, he led me out of his bunk.  
That night the guys wanted to go out. Alex was back to his normal self, for some reason and was full with energy. Him and Jack were throwing themselves at each other while the other guys tried to get them off the bus.  
"There isn't really anywhere we can go is there?" Rian said, his arms full of Jack.  
"I'm sure we will find somew- Jesus Alex how can you get you're leg that high you almost hit my face!" Zack exclaimed laughing at his hyperactive friends.  
I let them get out of the bus first, I was scared for my health here.  
20 minutes later, we were in someone's car, by the name of Martin Johnson or something. He must be a good friend to lend his car the these lunatics. We pulled up outside the liveliest club we could find on a Tuesday night.  
To my surprise it was packed. Really packed. I grabbed Alex's hand at the line for the door as we gazed through at the people dancing inside.  
"Wait, how are we even gonna get me in? I'm 17 remember." I asked gazing at the crowd.  
Alex laughed and squeezed my hand. "Hang on I'm thinking. Or better yet, don't think just walk."

fail.

We got stopped straight away.  
"Hey.. I recognise you.. You're the singer from All Time Low. I've seen you at Warped." The guy at the door had a friendly face.  
"Oh hey, I'm Alex, and this is Kaya" Alex said shaking the guys hand.  
"I'm Matt. I'm a guitar technician on call at tours and stuff, just in case." he said adding a laugh at the end.  
Alex smiled at him."That's always handy."  
Matt looked at me."Honey how old are you? Actually, don't tell me, just go have fun" he gave me a little shoulder pat and wink as he let us through.  
"Thanks man" Alex said, giving him one of those knuckle punch things.

The club was so loud. We lost Jack straight away, then about 2 minutes later we lost Rian and Zack.  
They were all off having a good time.

Into the night I was enjoying myself. I spent it with Alex dancing like an idiot with him, but having so much fun. He didn't look at the other girls as they danced around him for attention. His eyes stayed with me. That made me happy.

Well into the night, Zack came flying at us. He had pushed and shoved through the crowd to get to us. He was painting and had blood dripping from his nose.

"Fucking... Assholes-fighting..Jack... So many..." Zack tried to get out between breaths.  
Alex and I bolted out with Zack following him out the door. There was a crowd yelling in a massive huddle. Alex pushed through. I squeezed in, and I did not like what I saw. An unconscious Jack amongst all the fighting, and Rian trying to fend them off. It took the three boys about 4 minutes to get the random drunks off Jack. The drunks said they didn't like how he was looking at 'their girls'.  
As soon as they all pissed off Zack picked up Jack of the ground, and I followed, wiping the blood of Jacks face and torso.

Rian drove us all to the hospital. Alex and I sat it the back with Jack spread across our laps. Alex held my hand, his face stone cold and expressionless.

After what seemed, a long time Alex turned to me.  
"Why is it, the people close to me always end up like this?" his voice was cold and sad.  
"Alex, he's just hurt. He got into a fight. He's just being a boy. It's not going to kill him." I said to him.

"I've heard that before" Alex voice was barely audible.

And again, I see an icy tear roll down his cheek.


End file.
